Aspirations

Aspirations: a strong desire to achieve something high or great.

As odd as it may seem, I have found a song, that resembles my life right now.

Learning to Live by Beth Hart.

Each word in the lyrics to this song captivate my life right now. I have changed what I am attending school for. I think I have made a perfect choice for me. This is where I NEED to be in life. I am going for my Bachelors in Human Services and Management. Which in titles me to become a Social Worker. This is where my heart is, this is where I need to be. This will open me to a whole world of what I can do. Areas of work for me, that touch my life in many different personal levels. I will have the choice to work with people struggling with Addictions, Mental Illnesses, working in Nursing Homes and Hospice centers, as well as working with kids. There is a wide array of fields I can enter into with this degree, that have touched my life in some way or another..This is where I need to be...This is where I want to be...This is where I will be able to look back at my life, when I am at the end of my road, and be happy with what I have chose for my life. I begin my classes in a little less that a week. I am nervous. I am ecstatic. I am stressed. I am confident. I just want this to begin. I want to start my journey. I have my big girl pants on, and I am going to jump in and run with the winds..

Over this last weekend Ryan and I took Tyler to a park in Redmond, that is just amazing. There's no other words for this park. It was a 64 acre park. There was a dog park, gardening area, R/C airplane area, tennis courts, basketball, soccer, Croquet, kids area, a Subway. You name it, and it was there. We had a great time there. There was a high school baseball game being played on one of the fields, that we indulged into for awhile. We enjoyed watching them play..I also purchased through Craigslist a jogging stroller. I am ready to lose the rest of this flab. I can't believe how long it has stuck around, and how long it has taken me to lose it. I was doing fantastic with eating better, and monitoring what I eat, as well as how much. In the last couple of weeks I have fallen off the bandwagon, and I am ready to jump back on. With the Spring weather here, I have NO excuse not to get out and get my big ol' butt in shape...So my goal to achieve here within the next week to 2 weeks, is I have to purchase a few things:

1. New earphones for my iphone/ipod. The ones Apple gives you, are a joke.
2. New workout pants, the ones I have now, are waaaay too big for me..I guess that's a good thing, to some..but for me, not good enough!!
3. Arm band to put my iphone/ipod into while I am jogging.

Then I will be off...ready to run...and I feel it, that I am ready..So let's do this, let's bring it on. I need to lose these last remaining pounds. I weighed myself yesterday, and I'm weighing in at 123pounds. Although I think I have about 85 of those pounds in my stomach. Ugh. Ick. Grrrr..Why is it I have to carry my weight in the worst possibly spot. The hardest area to lose the weight. The most awkward place. Ohhh genetics, you just have to embrace them and take it as it is..I guess..I am ready though. Ready to run..well maybe not that much, but definitely ready to jog!! On April 11th, 2010. I will be participating the the Walk MS for Multiple Sclerosis. I will be walking with the team Moms with MS. I am very excited. I have never participated in such an event, and I look forward to this endeavor!!

I am on a recent journey within myself as well. I have came to an odd spot, and realizing I need to do some things for myself..I need to find myself. I need to break away from just being Mom, and find who I am..I am fighting learning about myself, and learning what I like, and things I want in my life. I am also on a journey to educate myself about different religions and different beliefs. I want to find what is right for me, and to have faith. I want to learn a hobby. I had the swift thought of making homemade cards. I am very interested in this, it's just getting the materials I will need to begin. I know Michaels always has great sales on scrapbooking materials, in fact the weekly ad for this week, has some fantastic deals. It's just making the time to get there..So I am working to 'find myself'...

I also am going through some 'drama' within myself currently..I am going to break away from somethings/some people in my life..I am going to work to build better relationships with some that I seem to neglect..The ones that are always there...nonjudgmental, supportive, and truly care from the bottom of their hearts..So wish me luck, as this is going to be difficult. I am going to hurt some, and hurt myself as I go through this. I am strong though. I have strength within me that will portray through the cracks with these steps..

As I approach a new road in life this next week, I am going to take on a lot more than just school. A step in life. Working for my future. Securing my future. Working on my health. Working on getting back in shape. Focusing on myself. Building confidence. Building my self-esteem. Most importantly being a Mom, being a Girlfriend, being a student, and being ME!

I make my departure from my chair today, to go through my day with the kiddos today. I will find 3 things today that I am grateful for. 3 things I loved about today. 3 things I am happy about. and 1 thing I disliked..I will reflect at the end of my day..Until then I must remove my bum from my chair, get me some more coffee, and get busy, busy, busy!!!

Good day to all whom walk across this blog today..

It's Been Awhile

A lot has changed since my last posting, and there have been some new adventures in life taken.

I will begin with; this is going to be a lengthy posting, so buckle that seat belt, and get ready.

An update on Tyler is far from over due. Tyler has been doing amazing on his 'head hitting'. We have experienced far and few between episodes of this. I would have to say that, Tyler has passed this phase. Through this I learned a lot about my child. I experienced his will and determination. Tyler is a very head-strong individual. I see many days ahead of me where Tyler and I will battle out our wills. Tyler is an incredible child!! Tyler is still enjoying reading a lot. In fact we purchases some new books for him, just yesterday. He has began to color, and enjoys spending his time coloring pictures. We are going through the stages of Tyler gaining his independence. I am no longer the one that he wants to help him anymore. :( Tyler wants to dress himself, put his shoes on by himself, clean up his toys, put his dishes in the sink, whatever it may be...he wants to do it on his own. His speech is improving day to day as well. I see where he tries to say words more. I am so proud of him! Tyler has brought so much into our home. Tyler's personality is such a unique personality. He truely is one of a kind.

I will not bore with my immense love and pride of a Mother for my son, I will move on now! I have signed up for college, and I will begin my classes on March 29th. I am very excited, yet I am overwhelmingly nervous. It shocks the every nerve in my body that I finally made the step and the move to better my life for myself. What the future holds for me...I am excited to experience. I am going now for my Associates of Arts in Elementary Education. I will continue after the 20 months(of school for A.A.) for my Bachelors degree in Elementary Education. I have not made the final decision yet of whether I am going to go with Elementary Special Education or leave myself open to general studies. I have always had a very dear spot in my heart for all people with developmental delays. I have awhile to make this decision still though. I am excited to begin my schooling. It feels as though it's been a lifetime since I last attended. Here's to the future!!

Ryan and I are still doing the same. We have worked on some of our debts since the begining of the year..well wait...we have worked on some of my debts...Soon enough before I know it, all will be taken care of...at least I hope. We have also continued on our journey of losing weight and improving our eating habits and health. I have went from 134 pounds to now at 125 pounds. I had went down some more, although I have had a bad couple of weeks. :) Ryan has decreased his soda intake from six or more sodas a day to only two. I must confess, I am impressed with him continuing with this. I have made some goals as of recently and I hope to be at 115pounds by my birthday on May 16th. I must get my rear end in gear and continue with what I have been doing, instead of slacking, and just making excuses for myself.

That there, is the jist of it all. I am working on planning Tyler's 2nd Birthday party. I am very excited for this. I did not do a party for Tyler's first birthday, and I regret it. Although I have learned that I will not do anything from here on out with him, that I will later regret, as in not having him a birthday party! He deserves it, and he deserves to have a day be all about him! He is a special boy. I hope to be able to have a BBQ potluck style. I looked at decorations online with Tyler and he chose some barnyard animals that he liked a lot. He loves animals, so perhaps we will go with that 'theme'.

With what is to come of the future I turn to and look at with the utmost excitement. The hard work, the determination, and the passion to get to what I want to be, and to become the person I want to be...I will continue my journey of becoming me, and learning new and insipiring aspects of who I am as each day ahead comes and goes. Nobody said this journey is going to be easy. I will not fail. I will be all that I want to be.